Learning To Trust

There are many things I've learned in life. But it seems on the process of learning these things, I've also UNLEARNED some things as well. One of these is how to TRUST. I just can't seem to bring myself to believing that not Everybody out there is bent on 'hurting' me. Not everybody is 'pretending'. That some people really are SINCERE and deserve to be trusted.

What has made me this way? My heart is like walled up with all kinds of high security-it wont let anything in anyhow. My mind has become overly protective of my heart.Whatever actions it sees,no matter how 'touched' my heart may be, my mind doesn't allow it. Like saying "don't be fooled..don't feel anything..you remember the pain, you don't want to go there again.."

What's the solution? My mind must be convinced that this person can be trusted. I must have no doubts whatsoever before I decide to trust. The problem is this is quite impossible. It always has to be a gamble. You always Have to be willing to loose.


I dunno, i really dunno what do do about this trust problem. I'm trying, really trying to TRUST but I'm not there yet. No matter how many reasons I already should have for trusting. No matter what people say-I can't force myself to TRUST YET.....

I must try and convince my mind to lower it's self defense. I must try and allow my heart to feel...I MUST LEARN TO TRUST!!

Because if I can't trust, How can I love??