The Promise (Tracy Chapman)

If you wait for me
then I'll come for you
Although I've traveled far
I always hold a place for you in my heart

If you think of me
If you miss me once in awhile
Then I'll return to you
I'll return and fill that space in your heart

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
If you'll be waiting

If you dream of me
L like I dream of you
In a place that's warm and dark
In a place where I can feel the beating of your heart

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
If you'll be waiting

I've longed for you
A and I have desired
To see your face your smile
To be with you wherever you are

Remembering
Your touch
Your kiss
Your warm embrace
I'll find my way back to you
Please say you'll be waiting

Together again
It would feel so good to be
In your arms
Where all my journeys end
If you can make a promise
If it's one that you can keep
I vow to come for you
If you wait for me

And say you'll hold
A place for me
I in your heart.


I soooo love this song....:)

Innocence is Bliss

Even the bible says for us to ‘mind your own business ‘ (1 Thess 4:11). I’ve just come to see the wisdom in these words. I have always been someone who in a way knows almost ‘everything’ going on in almost ‘everyone’s’ life. I was like a huge box of secrets…For some reason, things have changed. Maybe people have changed; maybe I have-maybe both. I am no longer the person who knows what’s happening and in fact seem to be quite opposite-someone who  is oblivious to whatever is happening around me. Someone who is innocent and thinks everything is going well….

I’m actually enjoying this newfound ‘innocence’ of mine.  Knowing sometimes just makes life a lot harder-you end up  with so many things to consider, your actions aren’t natural anymore, you always have to keep your tongue in check and make sure you don’t slip and say something you ought not to.

Now, I can stay my happy self, treat people equally, not have to hold  my tongue back due to some ‘secret’ I hold. Now, I can smile, laugh without being affected with whatever issues are unfolding. Yes, I do (only when given some hint) understand when something is going on. (People not talking to each other..etc) but my not knowing  doesn’t taunt me at all. 

I don’t really want to know the latest issues. I don’t want to have to take sides in some kind of ‘show of loyalty’. And I certainly don’t want to end up with a sober face, losing my happiness like they seem to be doing.

Innocence is indeed bliss. Don’t I care? Don’t I want to help and give my ‘advice’ ? Don’t I want to try and help make things right? yes- I care but I have this theory: -IF I AM SUPPOSED TO KNOW SOMETHING, I WOULD. IF I DON’T, IT SIMPLY MEANS I DON’T REALLY NEED TO KNOW…if the time comes that I DO NEED TO KNOW, THEN I WOULD..

I am finally accepting the fact that some things are really NOT MY BUSINESS period. No matter how ‘close’ I feel I am to some person, I am coming to terms with the fact that they don’t NEED to tell me everything, that they are entitled to keep some things to themselves. That friendship doesn’t entitle one to UNLIMITED knowledge and that they have every right to keep their ‘secrets’ and I simply have to accept and respect that…..

As to the cause of this revelation of mine, I’m blaming my mid 20’s again…:D

VIP #1 Ma m8

Ok, so since I’ve apparently misplaced my ‘box of secrets’ and can’t seem to find all those corny poems of mine, I’ve come up with an alternative that is just as corny (maybe even more).I shall give ‘tribute’ to the VIP’s in my life one by one……So this one’s for my m8..

This won’t be about personality stuff (he hates those things) so it’ll simply be about his being a VIP in my life…

First off, m8 is hmm….in a way ‘always’ there considering the miles I mean. For some reason, he pops out at very appropriate times like when I need to blabber about something, or when I’m extremely bored or maybe a little emotional…etc. And has therefore been there in some of the you know….’down’ shall we put it, times in my life….

I know at times he really doesn’t have time for my ‘nonsense’ (I can be extremely silly and perhaps even annoying) but nevertheless he puts up with my blabbering (it’s usually all I need) and when I’m done, I’m good as new and he can get back to more serious stuff..:D

I admit, he gets on my nerves at times but since he happens to get so much amusement from it, I can’t help but let it go. Then are the times he lets me think that I’m such a genius’ (like when I have some idea or think I know something) though he probably knows far better. He tries not to ‘burst my bubble’ but just lets me be and I’m betting maybe laughs at me silently. (I don’t blame him though..haha)

He makes me smile-more like laugh like crazy at times with his corny, sometimes silly jokes or experiences. And multiple times I find myself with a lot of to people around me curious about what’s made me laugh so hard (like they’d understand ey?) So that makes him one of my ‘happy drugs’ right next to ice-cream (hard to beat the accessibility of ice-cream .hahha)

If I were stranded on some remote island, he’d be one of the few people I’d choose to be with. If I were Megamind, I’d use my hydro gun on him so he could stay travel size:D If I were Mr Fredrickson,’ I’d take him to Paradise Falls with me. If I were Gru, he’d be Dr. Nefario (minion would be a little harsh..hahaha)… And he is also one of the reasons I wish I was a jumper with ‘teleporting’ powers……

Simply put, m8 is one of the few people I hope stays in my life and if he for some reason decides to ‘walk out’, he’d better start training an apprentice to take his place..OR ELSE!

And there goes VIP #1….TNXCHU 4 EVERYTHING YOU DID, ARE DOING AND WILL DO…. xox

Mid 20's Crisis?

I know there’s what they call ‘Midlife-crisis’ but I am diagnosing myself with ‘mid 20’s crisis’ (far off from anywhere close to midlife’). For some reason, I’ve just been feeling that everything is getting too ‘old’. I’m tired of my life (in a way). That feeling when you just find yourself doing the same routine over and over and over……again. Nothing’s fun, new or exciting anymore-it’s just BORING!

Ok, I know I have my ways of staying happy and I am. But it’s just OLD. Same people, same stuff, everything just the way it was yesterday. NO adventures, no meeting new people, no talking about new stuff (nothing new to talk about).

Suddenly, this has all just come crushing down on me. I’m seriously ‘over’ this place, ‘tired’ of the people in it and ‘bored’ with it all. My life has always had some kind of ‘adventure’ in it and ok yeah with my job I guess there are some bits of excitement there and there’s the ever challenging ministry but that’s it. Everything else is again-OLD.

I keep finding myself wishing to be someplace else (anywhere but CDO) with new people trying out new things. Getting to start from the beginning with friendships-you know, ‘hi’ ‘hellow’…getting to know each other kinda stuff. And the place? How about getting lost for once?….Going places you’ve never been…

I dunno, maybe it’s because people I’ve been with have moved on with their lives and I seem to be stuck in the same place ‘til now. And I find myself in a way ‘not belonging’ anymore.

This is probably why I savor all the moments I get to be away with new people, doing new stuff….and speaking of that-September is around the corner!!! But then, that’s just like one day. Vacations don’t get me refreshed, the make me wish I never had to go home..I wonder if that’s a good sign.

I don’t hate this place or the people in it. Change is inevitable- I know that and perhaps that’s what’s ‘wrong’…The world, people keep changing while I seem to stay motionless. It’s like you reach a point when you’ve done ‘everything’ everybody else is getting excited about, ‘felt’ whatever they’re feeling, ‘experienced’ whatever they have and basically ‘done it all’!

My list of options keeps on growing: go some remote place to volunteer, transfer cities all together (I’m old enough aren’t I?), get myself hitched, or one that just gives me Goosebumps-GO BACK TO ZAMBIA’!!-now wouldn’t that be an adventure?

Well, in a nutshell, I’ve somehow hit a wall and will keep walking around it until I find myself someplace new, with someone new, doing something new (new here defined as not from/in CDO) Til then it’s back to reality for me…

High School Corniness 1

I've come up with this idea to 'honor' those good old high school times. I'll be posting some corny stuff (poems, things done) that people I know did back then...gotta give ourselves some credit for surviving those hormones ey? So here's the time we sit back and laugh at ourselves. Here's something from Mr. Mermaid (not bad for High school i should say). I'm gonna have to find my corny stuff now...

ADIEU!

By: Ariel Parcon Jr.

I will not let my time be stained
By the memories of you
I will forget you
And erase the thoughts,
The person I knew,
The eyes I've always wanted to
Stare through time
I will blot out the feelings
Push away the raging emotions
Make silent the anger and love.
I will forget you
Your eyes will no longer haunt me
Your presence will not chill nor warm me
You will fade away
I will leave you, as you seem to have left me
Leave the unanswered hopes,
Surreal dreams
And I will smile.... ADIEU!

Well, that was one of Mr Parcon's poetic H.S moments.. Thanks for sharing!! Well? What was the corniest/sweetest/craziest thing you did in high school??

....YOU MAKE ME HAPPY....

It's the heart on your sleeve never making me wonder It's the bond that we tie up and over and under You're the sun and the rain and my grass is always green With a kiss on my cheek, always letting me know I'm the birds and the bees I'm the apple in your eye I know that you know that I know you're all I need

And just when I thought it couldn't get any better There you go and do it all again Hope this feeling never ends

'Cause you You make me happy You You make me happy

It's the sound of your voice at the end of the phone line A tickle in my toes just to know that you're all mine Like an ice cream sundae with a cherry on the top It's the look in your eyes when I'm wearing your t-shirt Your cute little smile after a long day of hard work And I know that you know that I can't give you up

And just when I thought it couldn't get any better There you go and do it all again Hope this feeling never ends

'Cause you You make me happy You You make me happy

Just when I thought it couldn't get any better There you go and do it all again Hope this feeling never ends

You You make me happy You You make me happy You You make me happy You You make me happy

Lindsey Ray - You Make Me Happy

Powered by mp3skull.com

A change of Mind

I’ve always believed that friends DON’T‘ mind their own business’ because they care. Real friends want to know what’s happening in your life not just for the sake of knowing but so that they can somehow help you. THAT’S WHAT FRIENDS ARE FOR right? Well I’m starting to have second thoughts on that ideal.

Is it my fault that ‘her’ guys flock to me and spill the beans? Hey, I don’t even have to probe them, they just go ‘ate emz..blah blah blah’. And what do you expect me to do? Cover my ears and tell them to rant someplace else?

Is it my fault that over and over again, these guys have so much ‘negative’ stuff to say? And who am I to say that they’re wrong when they probably know more than me not to mention the fact that these are not single incidents but reoccurring ones.

When they come to me for advice, am I wrong to let them know some ‘weaknesses’ or do you expect me to say ONLY the good stuff?? Hey, I CARE for both of them and as far as I know, everything I ever said was only for their good. And you know what? IF they had listened to my advice which went something like: “you’re both too young for these kind of things….how about you stay ‘just friend’s ‘ and see how things go in the future” NOBODY would have ended up hurt. And now I’m the bad guy?

Is it my fault that for some reason I only end up knowing these things from the other party? That I end up knowing all the 'tiny' details from them?

OK enough about whose fault it is already. My point is it seems in some people’s books, being a friend means minding your own business, not giving any advice, not saying anything negative, just leaving things the way they are and waiting for the fireworks to start.

But hey, I’m flexible and rather tired of all the drama. Yep, IT”S NOT MY LIFE (I know that-always have) and NOPE, I won’t die of “not knowing” and so maybe I’ll just sit back and get on with my uncomplicated life….Goodbye counselor, Goodbye ate, Goodbye to my definition of friend…

From now on, ‘FRIEND” means ‘hi’ ‘hello’s, having good times together and NEVER talking about personal stuff right? RIGHT! Would’ve saved myself a lot of headaches if I had done this earlier but you know me, ever concerned, ever helpful but all for nothing…Shall we shake on this? Coz You’ve got yourself a deal….^_^

A Glimpse

04-15-2012 we headed again to Manolo for preaching!! There is nothing like preaching in a nice, cool place away from the city:)For me, it just gave me a glimpse of how life would be in just a little while longer.

Living forever is something I've always wondered about(I've always thought I'd get bored after a while). But it just takes a day like this to help me realize that there is one very important thing that will make the BIG difference-THE PEOPLE.

Yep,we see each other practically every day but there always seems to be something to talk about, something to laugh about and off course a photo to take:)If these are the people you'll be with, with a couple of additions, FOREVER doesn't seem like a long time after all:)

Love your Job?

I can safely say that up until now, I never really could ever say that I actually LOVED what I did. That got me wondering WHY? What is so different that has made me say that I actually love my job?

I have this theory that I guess I can say is the reason behind all the love I'm feeling for my work right now. It depends person to person but I believe if the right 'bottons' are hit, anyone can come to love their work.

I think it has everything to do really about being able to get in touch with 'what we are capable of'. But the tricky part is to have the initiative, desire to get in touch with your capabilities. This is where I shall say 'CONGRATULATIONS' to my boss.

He knows what was important to me, lets me do 'my thing', no hard rules, no working hours that I don't want to, no restrictions on leaves, NOTHING that would make me end up 'hating' or maybe simply just 'not liking 'my job.

I have discovered that (at least in my case), if you are given the liberties that you need to keep you happy, you will end up giving your work you're ALL. In my case, even to the extent that I end up working more than I would've ever worked simply because I just WANT to finish whatever I've started.

In the past, with all the restrictions, big deal for leaves etc, who wants to burn their brain cells ayt? It was more of a 'I'll just do what I'm told..nothing more..nothing less..' My brain was in no mood for 'critical thinking' and brainstorming ...

Now, it's like 'they're good to me..so I'll be good to them',which means giving them unlimited access to my brain and whatever useful is in it.

The reasons behind you doing something are extremely important. For me, it's not simply 'doing my job' but more of 'proving to myself what I'm capable of', 'living up to their expectations'. It's KNOWING and SEEING that in a big way, what I do actually matters and that the company appreciates every thing I do:)

Plus comes the big,big bonus of showing/proving them that despite anything they may think or have heard about Jehovah's people, Being EXCELLENT WORKERS is part of who we are and that all the rules they 'bend' for us are worth it....

SO there you have it, this is me saying something I never thought I'd be able to say: I LOVE MY JOB♥

Missin dose gud Ol Dayz

Ok, I'll start by saying that I accept that fact that I am on EMO mode today. I've just got all these flashbacks of the good ol' days that I miss...

> Overnight movie marathon/project madness at Hanybunch's house (held a paintbrush for the first time...)
> Overnight 'heart 2 heart' talk with maders (solving each others heart problems..LOL)
> Fashion show moments (trying out ridiculous attires...)
> Overnight 'wedding planner' mode (getting in touch with our artistic selves...)
> Overnight farty farty /disco mode (show me your dance moves...hahaha..crazy days)
> Overnight alcohol trip (so many weird gins,spirits etc tasted there...:D)
> Future talk moments (getting life all planned out...)
> Anywhere/everywhere gurls (adventure is our middle name...)
> A bath for 3 (always in a rush...)

And the places I miss:
>2pan preaching....
>Samal preaching on top of the world
>Comval innocent tukud2x moments
>Angeles adventure
>Paranaque inspiration
>Davao LOL times

I guess change is inevitable. WE all have to grow up some day. We all have to move on. But the thing with memories is that they will always be a place you can run to. Things and people may change but your memories will always stay the same..they are one of the few things that nobody can take away:)

If You Think You're Beaten

If you think you're beaten, you are,
If you think you dare not, you don't.
If you'd like to win, but think you can't,
It's almost for sure, you won't.

If you think you're losing, you've lost.
For out in the world we find -
Success begins with a person's will,
It's all in the state of mind.

If you think you're outclassed, you are,
You've got to think high to rise.
You have to stay with it,
In order to win the prize.

Life's battles don't always go,
To the one with the better plan.
For more often than not, you will win,
If only you think you can.

~ C. W. Longenecker ~

Bz as a BEE

I've always had a 'BUSY' life or at least I thought that it was busy but I am admitting now that I never knew the meaning of the word. Even now, it seems this is still not the maximum busy I can be. Here's what I've realized about being busy:

1. You have so much to do, you don't know where to start.
2. You keep notepad open plus a paper nearby to list priorities during the day
3. You feel like 24 hours is not enough
4. You sleep like a baby out of exhaustion every night
5. You wake up and take a long time to start your day simply because you don't know where to start!
6. You fall asleep thinking of ways to be more effective/efficient the following day
7. You cherish every minute and get upset when people aren't punctual (so much to do and you're wasting my time!LOL)
8. You don't even have time for things you love (I MUST jog again!!!!:()
9. You calculate everything you do to make sure you get things done
10. You don't realize that you have no 'love life' hahahaha
11. You forget to reply to people's SMS's
12. You are amazed at what you are actually capable of (who would've thought....)
13. You are more time conscious than before
14. You forget to eat meals and if you don't, make them as short as possible
15. You don't know what's happening in other peoples lives (no time to wonder about FB)


Well, well being busy can actually be fun BUT it definitely drains you mentally, physically and emotionally. On the other hand, I have discovered that being busy is one of the ways to mind your own business, make the most of your time and get that sense of accomplishment. Valuable lessons in life don't you think??:)

Escape

"I'm tired of all of this".."I want out".."I want independence"..I guess we've all felt that way at one time or another. Fortunately, many of us came to our senses before we did anything 'stupid'. But sometimes, people end up learning the hard way that the 'spirit of independence' is not at all Godly and that friends and family just want to help. They don't mean to choke us, they don't mean to act like we can't do anything on our own. That the safest place we can be is in their company and under their guidance. Why the sudden 'realization'?

My/our dearest sister is back. She's pale, skinny, nearly unrecognizable but SHE'S BACK! After around 8 months thinking that she was being rebellious, had been influenced badly by friends, and had basically 'gone wild', we are proven WRONG. Maybe not 'totally' wrong since in the beginning she really did decide to go independent and not tell anyone where she was. But most of time, it wasn't her will after all. It just hurts to think that all this time while we thought she was such a 'bad girl' she was actually experiencing unimaginable torture.

Everyone had tears in their eyes as she explained all she was going through for the past 7 months. How she so badly wished she could go to the meetings. How she imagined being with us in the field service. How she tried again and again to escape but only ended up being caught and beaten again. How she prayed and prayed for rescue. How she was put through all kinds of physical, mental and psychological pain .How the minute she lost hope, surrendered trying to escape and felt she had been abandoned by us all, things just turned out in a very unusual way and she was saved.

Her experience just shows that Jehovah is indeed the provider of escape. He never forgot her. Though she did in a way turn her back on Him and sought independence, when things went terribly wrong, He still helped her. He is an examiner of hearts. According to her, during the torture sessions when she was slapped with a bottle of liquor on her face until it broke, when she was punched on her chest again and again and told to 'vomit blood' , when she was choked, kicked, and other inhumane acts, only the first blow hurt. After that, she could feel nothing until it was over. When her captor abused her verbally telling her 'nobody cared', 'your God has left you' , 'nobody will miss you'....what she heard were reminders from assemblies, watchtowers, talks that made her strong.

Jehovah may have allowed her to undergo all these things but the moment she gave up, the moment she said 'Am I really that bad that you have forgotten me?', she was rescued in a short of miraculous way. Things turned out so that her captor practically walked herself into jail without any effort on anyone's part. Everyone involved had to say it was a very, very unusual turn of events and they called her 'blessed'.

Lesson: NEVER, NEVER, NEVER underestimate the power of prayer. All the while, all who knew her continued mentioning her in prayer. She herself never stopped praying.... :"If you wish, save me but if you don't I'll understand, just give me strength to endure because I know this is all my fault".

The reunion the first time she attended the meetings after that is hard to describe. She amazingly was still able to energetically relate all she'd been through but it just took a hug to bring her to tears. I cried, many of us did. It just was and still is too hard to believe that such wicked/demonic people do exist. I went home and cried as I prayed, I just cried myself to sleep. I still shed tears wherever I am when I think of her and I really wonder if I would have the same courage and endurance as she did.

The story is extremely long, and has a lot of details that are too 'graphic' to mention so I'll end this with the words her mum told her captor with through the prison cell: 'What did you say about our God? You said He'd forgotten an abandoned her? It's OUR GOD JEHOVAH who put you in that cell."

My 'to-meet' list

I've already put together my 'to-do' list but one also should have a 'to-meet' list right? Imagine how many hundreds of faithful men and women of old will be resurrected! Well, so I don't get confused, after much thought, I've finally come up with my top 5 men and women I would love to meet.

Men:
• Moses (humility)
• Abraham (faith)
• Job (obedience)
• Joseph (long suffering)
• David (repentance)

Women:
• Sarah
• Easter (courage)
• Shulamite Maiden (love)
• Abigail (wisdom)
• Ruth (loyalty)

Something I just realized that is super exciting is the fact that forever is a very long time. We usually think of simply 'meeting' these people and maybe asking a little about their lives etc. But we have forever!! That means you don't just have to leave at 'meeting' them, you can actually get to really know them, become their friends! Now, I dunno bout you but that is just super duper COOL...:D
Well, in the new world my dear friends, you won't be seeing me for hmm...maybe a 100 years or so-I'll be too busy with my new friends!hahaha:D

SO? Who are you itching to meet and shall we add become their friend??:)

Just LIke SARAH

Sarah has always and will always be my favorite woman in the bible. Shes the imperfectly perfect example of what it means to be a woman..an ideal mother, ideal wife and loyal worshiper of Jehovah.She is an example of what REAL beauty is-love, loyalty, faith, courage.If there is one person I wish I could be like, it's her..^_^ Pretty soon, me gonna get myself some one on one tutorials from her on how to be just that-"A Godly Woman and a Precious Wife":)

If you were mine♥

This is something I heard over some radio show. The idea was to complete the sentence: " If you were mine_______" Well, here's what i'd say...

If you were mine, you'd wake up every day wondering what silly, fun, exciting, new things I'd be up to that day. ( yep, you'd be addicted but hey, so would I...:D)

if you were mine, I'd tell the world how great you are ( even if you aren't, you would be in my eyes..;)

If you were mine, you'd want to spend every second with me ( did I mention you'd be addicted?:P)

If you were mine, I'd treat you like a king ( I'll keep the details to myself...)

If you were mine, you'd brag about me to your friends (you tell me why...hahaha)

If you were mine, I'd be everything you dreamed of ( you'd forget any other girl you've ever known-OR ELSE..:D)

If you were mine, you'd want to tell me everything on your mind (coz you know I'd remember everything you say....)

If you were mine, I'd make sure you keep your figure (I'm vain about mine so flab just won't do...lol)

to sum it all up:


IF YOU WERE MINE, YOU'D BE THE HAPPIEST MAN ALIVE....^_^

Am I exaggerating here? Nope.. I know myself. And I know what I'm capable of especially when it comes to someone I love.ehem2x.... In fact, the rest of the list shall only be discovered by whoever gets to say 'I'm hers' and 'she's mine'...(cheezy much?)

Ready to die?

There are only two ways we can get to paradise: 1. Keep integrity in this wicked world and if the end comes in our lifetime, get to survive into the new world. 2. To die and get resurrected.

Road #1 is probably what we all prepare ourselves for-the great tribulation, staying faithful etc but I've realized that road #2-the one we seldom think of (who wants to think about death right?) is in a way much more probable than the first. Why?
Think about it-though we can witness so many signs, nobody knows when the end will come. Though there is a chance it will be in our lifetimes, the fact is-we could easily die before we witness it. Sometimes, we think of death to be caused by old age or some sickness. We always picture ourselves with families, settled down, maybe with kids, growing old.....but I just realized that our lives can be cut short ANYTIME..that death can overtake us without notice.

Unforeseen occurrences are become more and more rampant-floods, earthquakes, crime, accidents-anything can happen and anyone can be a victim. Coming to think about it, there have been quite a few witnesses who have been victims of such lately. A landslide took one or two witnesses, then came the flood which took another three...It's something we must understand-we are not exempted from these disasters, we have no special 'protection'..

Our protection lies in our hope..I dunno, it's just that the thought of being 'ready to die' has been on my mind a lot recently. So am I ready to die? I'm not sure...And how about the world? Is the world ready to lose me anytime? I wonder...I wonder who would be heartbroken if anything happened to me.. I wonder who'd regret not caring,....

Well, enough of that...I'll just live, laugh, love and treat everyday like it was my last...:)