Mid 20's Crisis?

I know there’s what they call ‘Midlife-crisis’ but I am diagnosing myself with ‘mid 20’s crisis’ (far off from anywhere close to midlife’). For some reason, I’ve just been feeling that everything is getting too ‘old’. I’m tired of my life (in a way). That feeling when you just find yourself doing the same routine over and over and over……again. Nothing’s fun, new or exciting anymore-it’s just BORING!

Ok, I know I have my ways of staying happy and I am. But it’s just OLD. Same people, same stuff, everything just the way it was yesterday. NO adventures, no meeting new people, no talking about new stuff (nothing new to talk about).

Suddenly, this has all just come crushing down on me. I’m seriously ‘over’ this place, ‘tired’ of the people in it and ‘bored’ with it all. My life has always had some kind of ‘adventure’ in it and ok yeah with my job I guess there are some bits of excitement there and there’s the ever challenging ministry but that’s it. Everything else is again-OLD.

I keep finding myself wishing to be someplace else (anywhere but CDO) with new people trying out new things. Getting to start from the beginning with friendships-you know, ‘hi’ ‘hellow’…getting to know each other kinda stuff. And the place? How about getting lost for once?….Going places you’ve never been…

I dunno, maybe it’s because people I’ve been with have moved on with their lives and I seem to be stuck in the same place ‘til now. And I find myself in a way ‘not belonging’ anymore.

This is probably why I savor all the moments I get to be away with new people, doing new stuff….and speaking of that-September is around the corner!!! But then, that’s just like one day. Vacations don’t get me refreshed, the make me wish I never had to go home..I wonder if that’s a good sign.

I don’t hate this place or the people in it. Change is inevitable- I know that and perhaps that’s what’s ‘wrong’…The world, people keep changing while I seem to stay motionless. It’s like you reach a point when you’ve done ‘everything’ everybody else is getting excited about, ‘felt’ whatever they’re feeling, ‘experienced’ whatever they have and basically ‘done it all’!

My list of options keeps on growing: go some remote place to volunteer, transfer cities all together (I’m old enough aren’t I?), get myself hitched, or one that just gives me Goosebumps-GO BACK TO ZAMBIA’!!-now wouldn’t that be an adventure?

Well, in a nutshell, I’ve somehow hit a wall and will keep walking around it until I find myself someplace new, with someone new, doing something new (new here defined as not from/in CDO) Til then it’s back to reality for me…